Dog jumps out third-floor window after a cat – is saved by his giant ears (owners claim)

Yes, of course. There’s nothing like a trip to the Lake District to watch the basset hounds soaring high above Continue reading →

Kim Kardashian reveals her secret to the perfect cleavage – and it sounds painful

PLEASE NOTE – Kim Kardashian has large breasts and a big bottom. So cop a quick look and get over Continue reading →

An intern left a hidden message for his employer on a Post-It

This raises some important questions and startling revelations. For example, if he wrote the note on the first day of Continue reading →

Man does ‘MDMA and cocaine, steals ambulance then masturbates in police custody’

  Basically all he’s done is combine an entire semester of university into one day.

Morrisons has launched a foot long sausage roll and it only costs £1

  I hope and pray that one day, when asked how tall I am, I will be able to proudly Continue reading →

Man accused of smuggling deadly king cobras to US inside potato chip cans

  It’s always best to be aware of the local customs and vernacular before visiting another country. For example, while Continue reading →

Sign outside LukeJacob hairdressers in London threatens to give unattended children mullets

  As an additional warning, the shop owner should remind parents that Chuck Norris, Jean Claude Van Damme and Billy Continue reading →

Teenager cut off his own hand because he was addicted to the internet

Won’t make much difference. You know what they say – the devil makes work for idle hand.