(I Can’t Get No) Sanitizer

I can’t get no sanitizer, I can’t get no sanitizer ‘Cause I try and I try and I try and Continue reading →

Ghost Story

In a recent issue of Fortean Times (recommended reading), I learnt that Mitch Winehouse claims Amy Winehouse’s ghost returns to Continue reading →

The Story of the Lonesome Skater

When I was young, I couldn’t skate to save my life. If polar bears were chasing me across the ice, Continue reading →

The Washing of Hands

Recently, I was in a large bookstore and had to urinate. I decided to find the washroom, rather than let Continue reading →

List of Banned Children’s Books

Despite the best intentions of authors and publishers, every year books are banned by councils and districts around the world. Continue reading →

Woman finds ‘alien’ in a bottle of vinegar

1) Highly advanced, intelligent being leaves safety of distant home planet 2) Navigates perilous journey, carrying message of peace 3) Continue reading →

Freud & Happiness: An Absurdist Tragedy

In Civilization and its Discontents, Freud suggests that the purpose of life is the pursuit of happiness – guided by Continue reading →

There’s a petition to block MP’s pay rises and it already has 365k signatures

I’m dead against it. I think all MPs should be paid with pieces of aluminium foil and small bits of Continue reading →