Bodybuilder reveals how he almost died from ladybird bite

Ladybirds have been keeping bodybuilders off my plants for decades. They are a highly effective, completely natural, 100% environmentally friendly Continue reading →

The Ultimate Guide to Resisting, Undermining and Destabilizing Boris and his Brexit Circus: Step 1

  We live in a democracy, so I’m told. Everyone is entitled to their opinion of Brexit without shame or Continue reading →

Blackbird rides eagle in latest display of nature being badass

Note to all passengers: the baggage allowance is ONE nut, berry or seed maximum size of 56 x 45 x Continue reading →

Harry Kane fivers worth £50,000 are now in circulation somewhere in Britain

I know how you can turn a fiver into £50,000. To learn my secret, please mail me a fiver.   Continue reading →

Farmer builds 30ft wall of hay to ‘annoy neighbours who blocked his planning permission’

He has two brothers. One brother made a wall out of sticks and the oldest brother made one out of Continue reading →

Chancellor claims driving trains is so easy ‘even a woman could do it’

  Actually, if women were driving them maybe they’d run on time for a change. I say we try it.

Rude Arrows: RAF pilot denies leaving giant penis vapour trail in sky

    A similar scene was cut from ‘Top Gun’. Producers thought it already had enough homoerotic undertones.

Brexit supporters want British passports without French words – there’s one major flaw

Furthermore, French Dressing will become just “Dressing”, French’s Classic Yellow Mustard will be shortened to “Classic Yellow Mustard”,  Gérard Depardieu Continue reading →