One of them asked me how my mother was. I took offence – what business is it of his? “He” claimed I was being difficult. I told it to shut up about my family, especially during the holidays. He told me my gifts were cheap. I told him to back off. The red light went on. Store staff rushed over and separated us. In the confusion, that idiotic machine forgot to charge me 5p for my plastic bag. So who got the last laugh?